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Impossibility of not communicating

Within an interaction, neither person can stop behaving, and each adapts to the other's behavior. Whether they are talking or remaining silent, being active or passive, they are behaving. Each person perceives the other's behavior and attaches meaning to some of it.

Those behaviors to which meaning is assigned become messages. Since any behavior can become a message, it is impossible to keep from generating meaning within an interaction. In this sense one cannot communicate.

In an interaction, anything you do or not do is communicating some message. If you move closer to someone when talking to them, you are communicating one thing, if you stay where you are, you are communicating something else. Depending on the role each person is in, who they are, what the current situation is, different actions and words could communicate different things.

Self-disclosure and self-image

Self-disclosure in interaction is a revealing of the "inner" or "real" person to another, or the revealing or concealing of significant information about one's feelings or experiences. Self-disclosure relates to self-image, which is a persons image of him or herself that consists of a set of role images. In various different roles, you have an image of yourself as acting in some fashion or being yourself in some way. Self-disclosure could be an ongoing attempt to not disclose information about yourself and your feelings in an attempt to defend your self-image. If you disclosed all your personal feelings, you might perceive yourself as being vulnerable.

The self or self-image is the center from which all communication occurs. When there is a perceived threat to the self-image, communication will be characterized by defensiveness. Defensive communication involves a person's attempt to conceal some significant meaning in order to protect his or her self-image. For example, if someone criticized someone else by calling them incompetent, the other person may start to feel stupid, and would want to hide that. It might make them defensive and want to conceal their self, or self-image of being a stupid person. People try to defend their self-images. Someone could try to hide aspects of their self-image or hide feeling and decisions they have about their lives. These feelings and decisions may or may not be understood by other people. Someone could go a long time in a relationship with someone else and be hiding certain feelings because they are being defensive or they just don't want the other person to know.

Disclosure of experience in the here and now

One aspect of disclosure is the expression of what a person is feeling, thinking, and experiencing in the "here and now". There is a sense in which healthy communication can be achieved only if both persons involved in an interaction are openly, freely, and spontaneously expressing to each other what they are experiencing in the immediate situation. Difficulties in communication occur when a person is trying to communicate one thing while actually feeling or experiencing something else. For example, homosexuals may be attracted to straight people but would probably hide their feelings when interacting with them because it isn't appropriate. There are probably incredibly complicated ways in which people's feelings are or are not being expressed in moment to moment interactions (between both friends and strangers, heterosexuals and homosexuals, etc).

Effective communication involves congruency between what a person is experiencing and what the person is expressing in an interaction. So if a person is feeling angry, they should express that they are angry in an appropriate fashion. Disclosure doesn't necessarily mean that the person needs to reveal all their secrets, it does, however, mean they need to reveal the appropriate amount of information at the appropriate times. For instance, a parent getting angry at a child without expressing why they are angry wouldn't be appropriate because the child wouldn't know what to do to stop the parent from getting angry at them in the future. The parent would appear to the child to just get angry and the parent wouldn't then be properly disclosing, or communicating, that they are angry and the cause of their anger.

Incongruency between role and context

Major difficulties in interpersonal communication occur when a person assumes a role that does not fit in the context of the transaction. Suppose two army buddies go out drinking. Their evening is going pleasantly when Frank (a sergeant) says to bob (a corporal), "Get me another drink." "Get it yourself, I've had enough," replies Bob. Frank threatens, "Listen, i outrank you. Don't you forget that. And I ordered you to get me another drink." The role Frank assumes is appropriate within the context of conducting military business but incongruent with the context of two buddies out for a good time. Whether Frank spoke in seriousness or in jest, Bob will probably feel hurt and resentful. The incongruency between role and context, therefore, becomes the source of difficulties in communication between Frank and Bob.

This could be a source of great amusement. You could consider every interaction one in which each person is supposed to fit a certain role, or roles. If they don't fit those roles things could go dramatically wrong.

Incongruency between roles

Difficulties in interpersonal communication arise when two people in a transaction assume roles that are incongruent. If danny is trying to talk to Mary as a friend and Mary is responding to Danny not as his friend but as his supervisor, their roles are clearly incongruent.

Questions & Answers

what is Nano technology ?
Bob Reply
write examples of Nano molecule?
The nanotechnology is as new science, to scale nanometric
nanotechnology is the study, desing, synthesis, manipulation and application of materials and functional systems through control of matter at nanoscale
Is there any normative that regulates the use of silver nanoparticles?
Damian Reply
what king of growth are you checking .?
What fields keep nano created devices from performing or assimulating ? Magnetic fields ? Are do they assimilate ?
Stoney Reply
why we need to study biomolecules, molecular biology in nanotechnology?
Adin Reply
yes I'm doing my masters in nanotechnology, we are being studying all these domains as well..
what school?
biomolecules are e building blocks of every organics and inorganic materials.
anyone know any internet site where one can find nanotechnology papers?
Damian Reply
sciencedirect big data base
Introduction about quantum dots in nanotechnology
Praveena Reply
what does nano mean?
Anassong Reply
nano basically means 10^(-9). nanometer is a unit to measure length.
do you think it's worthwhile in the long term to study the effects and possibilities of nanotechnology on viral treatment?
Damian Reply
absolutely yes
how to know photocatalytic properties of tio2 nanoparticles...what to do now
Akash Reply
it is a goid question and i want to know the answer as well
characteristics of micro business
for teaching engĺish at school how nano technology help us
Do somebody tell me a best nano engineering book for beginners?
s. Reply
there is no specific books for beginners but there is book called principle of nanotechnology
what is fullerene does it is used to make bukky balls
Devang Reply
are you nano engineer ?
fullerene is a bucky ball aka Carbon 60 molecule. It was name by the architect Fuller. He design the geodesic dome. it resembles a soccer ball.
what is the actual application of fullerenes nowadays?
That is a great question Damian. best way to answer that question is to Google it. there are hundreds of applications for buck minister fullerenes, from medical to aerospace. you can also find plenty of research papers that will give you great detail on the potential applications of fullerenes.
what is the Synthesis, properties,and applications of carbon nano chemistry
Abhijith Reply
Mostly, they use nano carbon for electronics and for materials to be strengthened.
is Bucky paper clear?
carbon nanotubes has various application in fuel cells membrane, current research on cancer drug,and in electronics MEMS and NEMS etc
so some one know about replacing silicon atom with phosphorous in semiconductors device?
s. Reply
Yeah, it is a pain to say the least. You basically have to heat the substarte up to around 1000 degrees celcius then pass phosphene gas over top of it, which is explosive and toxic by the way, under very low pressure.
Do you know which machine is used to that process?
how to fabricate graphene ink ?
for screen printed electrodes ?
What is lattice structure?
s. Reply
of graphene you mean?
or in general
in general
Graphene has a hexagonal structure
On having this app for quite a bit time, Haven't realised there's a chat room in it.
how did you get the value of 2000N.What calculations are needed to arrive at it
Smarajit Reply
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Source:  OpenStax, A self help and improvement book: useful psychology information (an integration of personality, social, interaction, communication and well-being psychology). OpenStax CNX. Jul 11, 2016 Download for free at http://legacy.cnx.org/content/col11139/1.47
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